Leading the Family Choir

Have you ever heard the expression, you could not carry a tune in a bucket.  Well, I am the guy that does not even have a bucket for that tune.  I was not blessed with a singing voice and that is why I have always had an appreciation for those who can sing. 

Recently I had a chance to attend a choir concert at our local high school where my niece performed.  We were lucky enough to be in the audience as each grade had the chance to showcase what they had been working on this year.  We heard some talented groups perform some great songs. Don’t worry, I won’t sing them for you. 

One of the things that stood out to me at this performance were the conductors of the various choirs who performed.  We had great seats and I don’t remember a time where we were close enough that the conductor stood out to me. It was great to see how they lead their groups in the performance.  You could tell each of them was in their element leading the group. The passion they had for the music and more importantly their students.

I spent most of my time there listening to the music but my eyes were fixed on the conductors.  The way the controlled the musical instruments and the voices in the choir with their command was amazing.  The music seemed to dance at their command as the pulled those magical notes out of each one of the kid’s mouths.  The lead a great performance.  

The leadership they showed to bring us that great music was something to behold.  What was even more impressive is what they were able to get out of their students.  We as the audience were all there for the performance. The conductors were there for their students and that is what made the performance. 

As a parent, I feel like my day is much like a director in front of the choir.  I do talk with my hand so I know I look like I am directing a choir more times than not but as a parent, we lead our own choir every day.  Somedays the music is sweet and some days it sounds like I am singing a solo. As I watched conductors lead their choirs there are a couple of things that stood out to me.  Here are three things we can need to understand to lead our family choir.

You need to turn your back on the crowd –  Any choir you go to you are going to find the director facing the choir.  At least I hope you are. Can you imagine the music coming from a choir where the director is leading the crowd and not the choir?  

In order to get the sweetest music from your choir, you need to turn you back on the crowd.  This does one important thing. It shows you and them what your focus is. As a parent leader, you need to block out the noise of the crowd and do what is best for your family.  

You pick the music –  I doubt there are too many choir concerts you have been there where the group is taking requests from the crowd.  The audience is there to enjoy what was prepared by the choir. The director knows their team and tries to put them in the best path for success.  

The songs picked should depend on the talents of those in the choir.  Those solos during the concert should be a way to spotlight the specific skills and talents of the members of the choir.  What the director chooses could be something that requires his team to grow and become something better.  

As parent leaders, we need to understand that we pick the music of our family.  It is up to us to put our family in places where they can find success and confidence.  There is a lot of noise out there and people who are going to offer their opinions on what we should be doing.  We need to take those into consideration and have real conversations about what we are doing as parents. But we need to understand that ultimately we decide the music of our family.  

Tell them to smile –  There was something the conductor did often that surprised me.  Multiple times during the nite as the groups were singing he would give the group a big smile.  He did this for 2 reasons. To remind them to smile during their performance. It is much more enjoyable for the audience when those performing are enjoying themselves.  

The second reason was to remind them to have fun.  It is a very long and boring life if we don’t take the time to have fun.  This reminded these kids they took the class because they enjoy singing. So why should this be any different?  Now was a time to enjoy and show the work they have put in.  

Take the time to have fun.  When there is work to be done get it done.  However, we need to always remember the reason we put in the work is to get time to have fun.  Prioritize time to have fun with your family. Tell them to smile. More importantly, give them a reason to simile. 

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Image by Gustavo Rezende from Pixabay