The Greatest Gift We Can Give
What did you want to grow up to be when you were younger? I know we all had amazing dreams to become an astronaut, a firefighter, or maybe even a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. Don’t laugh there was a time where I might or might not have wanted to grow up to be a Ninja Turtle. I mean fighting crime, know karate, and all I needed was some radioactive ooze to make it happen. What can I say I had big plans.
As I grew older I realized that my lofty dreams of becoming a Ninja Turtle were not going to pan out. So I set my sights just a bit lower and just wanted to be a star in the NBA. We have all had those thoughts and dreams about who we will be and what we will be doing when we grow up. I am still holding out hope that maybe someday down the road I will be the first Ninja Turtle to play in the NBA.
We have all had those lofty dreams about who we can become. Somewhere along the line as we shared those dreams I am sure we ran into people who supported us and those who might have told us that it was harder to find radioactive ooze than we might have thought it would be and gave us a little shot of reality.
These future plans are important and almost as important to the people we hold close in our lives. We tend to become what the most important people in our lives think we will become. As leaders of our families, we hold a very important role in how we see and develop the members of our family. Our children, spouses, even our siblings are looking to us to help them become something more.
This can work in both positive and negative ways. If you had a parent to consistently told you that you were not good enough after time we start to believe that is who we are. On the other hand, when you have a spouse who is always telling you what talents you have and what you can become our actions start to work to be that person they see in us.
I am very lucky and have the most amazing wife who is a great leader in our family. One day over lunch my wife gave me the greatest give I believe one person can give another. She told me what she believed I could become. She shared with me the potential that she saw in me and let me tell you it was something that really took me back. What she saw I could become was something I never saw in myself. The funny thing was after that conversation my actions started to change.
That very night I started doing things I knew I should be doing to become a better person but had never put into play because I was lazy. After that conversation, it was easier to do those things I thought were hard before. Because I wanted to become that person she told me I could be. She saw not only who I was but she believed I could become something greater, and guess what, I now believe that too.
Within our family organizations, we need to take the time to tell those important to us what we believe they can become. This does not mean the vocation they will have when they are older but take the time to point out the important things like character and talents they may not realize they have. Having the belief of those closest to us can be a great motivator and this belief will be what drives us to be something more than we are. It drives us to discover the greatness within us.
This will not only show them they have someone in their corner when times get difficult but will also help us lead them as we look at them not only for who they are but who they can become. As difficult times come in our relationship where our children don’t like the curfew we give them, or we make them eat their vegetables we can help them see how what we are doing now will help them be who they can become. Great leaders and great parents don’t take the easy way out in the here and now but they act as leaders and see the vision of the future and help others see that vision as well. In our hands, we help guide them to that place of their potential. The greatest gift we can give the members of our family is believing not only in them but who they can become.